From Classroom to Playground – Helping Kids Recognize Moments to Step Up

Joseph Catalino

One thing I’ve learned as a dad: kids don’t always know when it’s their turn to step up. Sometimes they’re too busy thinking about Minecraft, soccer, or whether their snack pack has enough Oreos.

But leadership moments aren’t just for boardrooms or sports captains—they happen everywhere. In the classroom, on the playground, at the dinner table. The trick is helping our kids notice those moments, and then giving them the courage to step into them.

Spotting the “Step Up” Moments

My daughter once told me she didn’t answer a question in class because she “wasn’t sure.” Fair enough—nobody wants to risk getting it wrong in front of their peers. But I asked her, “What if you were 75% sure? Would you try?”

She looked at me like I had just invented a new form of torture math. But that’s the lesson: leadership isn’t about being 100% right. It’s about being willing to try. To raise your hand. To step into the silence.

On the playground, “stepping up” looks different. Maybe it’s noticing the kid who’s left out of the game. Maybe it’s offering to be “it” when nobody else wants to. Maybe it’s being the one to say, “Okay, let’s make new rules so everyone can play.”

The Dad Toolbox for Step-Up Training

So how do we train our kids to spot these moments? Not by nagging. (Trust me, I’ve tried. Doesn’t work.) Instead, I use these little tricks:

1. The “What Would You Do?” Game

At dinner, I’ll throw out scenarios: “What if the teacher asked a question and nobody raised their hand?” or “What if two kids were arguing over the soccer ball?”

Her first answer is usually “I don’t know.” But once I push, she starts to think about it—and that’s where the magic happens.

2. Playground Debriefs

After school, I’ll ask, “Was there a moment you could’ve stepped up today?” Most days she shrugs. But sometimes she surprises me: “Yeah, I helped the new kid figure out the game.” That’s leadership—hidden in plain sight.

3. Letting Them Lead at Home

At home, I give her leadership practice. She gets to pick dinner, choose the weekend activity, or even decide how we do chores (which, to her, often means Dad gets the short end of the deal). These small chances build confidence that carries into the classroom and playground.

Modeling Stepping Up

Here’s the tough part: I can’t just talk about it. I have to model it.

When I volunteer to help the coach, when I introduce myself to someone new, when I speak up in awkward situations—she sees it. Which means if I want her to step up, I have to show her what it looks like in action.

It’s unfair, honestly. I just want to coast through Target in peace, but instead I’m “Dad the Role Model” 24/7.

The Confidence Factor

Here’s what I’ve learned: kids aren’t afraid of stepping up because they don’t care. They’re afraid because they don’t feel confident enough.

That’s why I celebrate the tries. Not just the wins. If she raises her hand and gets the answer wrong, I still cheer like she just nailed a free throw. Because confidence grows not from always being right, but from knowing you can survive being wrong.

A Dad’s Reflection

The more I think about it, the more I realize stepping up is really about noticing. Noticing when there’s a gap, when something needs to be done, when someone needs help.

That’s the kind of leader I want my daughter to become—not the bossy kid barking orders, but the one who quietly steps up when it matters most.

And every time she tells me she tried—even if it was something small—I feel like we’re building those muscles, one little moment at a time.

A Challenge for Other Dads

This week, ask your kid: “What was one moment today you could have stepped up?” Don’t let them get away with “nothing.” Push a little. Ask questions.

And give them chances at home to practice. Let them choose dinner, run a chore, or plan the weekend. Step back. Let them lead.

Because raising leaders isn’t about waiting for the perfect stage. It’s about teaching kids to recognize the small stages all around them—classrooms, playgrounds, and yes, even Target aisles.

And if they learn to step up there? They’ll be ready when the bigger moments come.