The War on Originality – Helping Kids Stay Themselves in a World of Copycats
Every generation has its battlefield. For ours? It’s not just math homework or screen time. It’s the war against conformity.
Individuality, originality, individualism—they’ve always been under assault. The weapons? Trends. Fads. Whatever TikTok decided was “in” this week. And trust me, they’re coming for your kid’s soul one glittery water bottle and overpriced sneaker at a time.
Conformity, Kid-Style
When I was a kid, it was slap bracelets, pogs, and Starter jackets. (If you had the jacket, you were basically royalty. If you didn’t, you were a peasant in Reebok high-tops.)
Today? It’s Crocs with socks, Prime energy drinks, and learning a TikTok dance that looks like everyone is hailing a taxi in unison.
Kids will tell you, “No, Dad, it’s just what everyone’s doing.” Exactly. That’s the problem.
The Playground Assembly Line
Here’s how it happens:
One kid shows up with something new.
Three kids copy.
By the end of the week, it looks like an assembly line of clones.
Suddenly, your sweet, quirky child who used to make up their own games is now standing in the corner trying to master a Fortnite dance that looks like a full-body sneeze.
And heaven forbid they resist. Because if they don’t have the “thing” (whatever the thing is this week), they’re “weird.” Which, last I checked, used to be called original.
Dad’s Job in the Clone Wars
So where do we come in as dads? Here’s the tricky balance:
Mock the fad just enough so they realize it’s silly.
Don’t mock it too much, or you become the enemy.
Sneak in the lesson that individuality is cooler than conformity—without sounding like you’re pitching a 1990s after-school special.
Example: My daughter begged for slime. Every kid had slime. So we made slime. Within three days, it was in the carpet, on the dog, and possibly still stuck to the ceiling fan. She hasn’t asked for slime since. Originality 1, conformity 0.
The Myth of “Fitting In”
Here’s the big lie: if you just follow the trend, you’ll be accepted. Wrong. Because the trends never stop. The goalpost moves every week. You’ll never be enough of a clone to satisfy the clone factory.
I tell my daughter: “If you’re always chasing what’s popular, you’ll always be behind. But if you’re yourself, you’re already ahead.”
She rolls her eyes. (Eye-rolling is also a trend, apparently.)
A Military Parallel (Yes, Even Here)
In the military, conformity has its place. You want your squad to wear the same uniform, march in the same direction, and not freestyle in formation. That’s good conformity—it keeps people alive.
But the leaders who stood out? The ones who earned respect? They were the ones who thought differently. Who saw problems from new angles. Who didn’t just follow the manual but knew when to adapt.
That’s individuality with discipline. And that’s exactly what I want my daughter to learn: fit in when it matters, but don’t lose yourself in the crowd.
How to Raise a Non-Clone
Here are a few tricks I’ve found:
Celebrate Weird. If your kid loves bugs, let them love bugs. If they want to wear mismatched socks, let them rock it like it’s Paris Fashion Week. The world doesn’t need more beige.
Tell Trend War Stories. Share your old fad disasters. “Yes, I wore Z Cavaricci jeans. Yes, I was cool (not).” It gives them perspective.
Give Them Creative Outlets. Music, art, writing, sports—anything that lets them express themselves instead of parroting TikTok.
Model Originality. Don’t just preach it. Live it. Let them see you take the road less traveled. And if you wear Crocs, at least own it shamelessly.
A Dad’s Reflection
Watching my daughter navigate this world of endless trends has been… entertaining. And terrifying. One week she wanted a Hydro Flask because “everyone has one.” The next week it was Stanley cups. At this rate, our kitchen is going to look like a hydration museum.
But then I catch her drawing her own comics, making up songs on the piano, or telling me she likes her sneakers even if they’re not the “cool” brand. And that’s when I breathe a sigh of relief.
Because individuality isn’t about avoiding every trend—it’s about not losing yourself in them.
A Challenge for Other Dads
This week, when your kid begs for the “thing,” don’t just say yes or no. Ask: “Do you actually like it, or do you just want it because everyone else has it?” Push them to think.
Then—encourage them to do one thing that’s totally their own. A drawing, a crazy outfit, a new game, even a made-up joke. Celebrate the weird. Laugh with them. Remind them that being different is not a curse—it’s their superpower.
Because the world doesn’t need another kid doing the same TikTok dance. It needs your kid—being exactly who they are.
Closing Thought
Conformity is the single greatest threat to originality, but it’s also the easiest to fight. All it takes is the courage to say, “I like what I like, even if you don’t.”
And if our kids learn that early—if they learn to laugh at trends, to try things because they love them, not because everyone else does—then they’ll carry something way cooler than any fad: authenticity.
Because fads fade. Original lasts.